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Zero distance contact

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Zero distance contact
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Confession


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“ Me: Today, I used WeChat to confess to female students. Her reply is an ellipsis. What does it mean? Roommate: These six points are implicit to tell you, don't confess, go out and be a monk! ”

Traffic accident


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“ A colleague accidentally killed a sheep after driving, and after compensation, he compensated the sheep farmer for a thousand pieces, and he had to take away the dead sheep. Sheep farmer: No, you killed my sheep and took the sheep away. You want to kill people. Do you still have to take people away? ”

But I can't!


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“ You can be very mediocre, you can be very confused, you can be very inferior, you can be very obese, you can be talentless, you can have no hope, you can not be rich, you can not be beautiful. . . But I can't! ”

when is your wife convenient?


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“ Farmer: I often feel cold after going to bed at night. Doctor: I have also had it. At that time, I will hold my wife and it will be warm. Farmer: This is a good way, but when is your wife convenient? ”